"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I should be sponsored by Trojan
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
