i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Randomize
