How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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