im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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