Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
