Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
