He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
