So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
My pussy is not your playground.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
