make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I smell like Dick and happiness
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