Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
