Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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