No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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