i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
He called his prostate his "boner button".
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
