So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
