I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
