You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
