All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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