you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize