i don't plan on having that self control this summer
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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