check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
