lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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