He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
You are a genius and a whore.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
