this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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