My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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