never play flip cup with pint glasses
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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