U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize