In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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