Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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