I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
only you would photoshop your dick
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
