this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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