You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
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