Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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