Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
