that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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