It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
