there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
a search helicopter?!
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
