Yo dont text me then not text me
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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