are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Randomize
