Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
