the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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