we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
ttyl tear gas
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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