she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize