hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
