How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
