What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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