You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize