You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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