i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
