If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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