Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize